The Best Way to Connect with Couples

Couples who like you will buy your services more often than those who don’t. But how do you get them to like you in the first place?

There’s no one thing that makes someone to feel connected with you. In reality, it’s lots of different things that trigger positive emotions.

Sure, a magnetic personality goes a long way. People tend to follow charismatic leaders, and if you can showcase a personal brand that draws in ideal clients, you’ll have a good chance at filling your calendar with projects you love hosted by people who you like.

But not everyone is attracted to strong personalities. And many of those could be your ideal clients. They might have tons of money in the bank, offer full creative license, and invite tons of friends and family to the celebration who could be future clients…but if they don’t connect with you, they won’t book your services in the first place.

So how do you connect with couples? 

By making them feel heard, feel understood, feel recognized, and feel important. I’ve said it before and I’ll say it again: The wedding isn’t about you, it’s about them. 

So, start from the very beginning and put the focus on the couple.

  • What is important to them on the wedding day?

  • What deeper psychological motivations are driving the decision?

  • What emotions are holding them back?

Keep this in mind, though: The most successful business owners in the wedding industry won’t stop at “what” they need to do. Oh no. 

The ones who thrive – the ones who book ideal clients more often – those people focus on the “how.”

  • How does this person naturally communicate?

  • How can I convey value in ways that are important to them?

  • How can I build trust to reduce their fears?

Remember: Your business exists to solve a problem for your clients. What is the problem (or unmet desire)? And how do you help them fix this problem (or get what they desire)?

Make your clients feel “seen”

People want to know you “get them,” that you understand where they’re coming from and know where they want to go. 

One way to demonstrate that is by sharing solutions you’ve offered to others like them. 

This is why you showcase your portfolio. It’s a way to let them know, “Hey, I’ve been where you want to go with people like you in the past. And I can get you there too!” 

The right testimonials will help convey this as well.

It’s also why “conversion” website copy works better than “cute and clever” copy. When you tell people you know their problems/unmet desires – and you describe it for them in detail or through words that paint a picture for them to envision – they recognize your empathy and understanding. 

And this forms a connection between you and them. One that’s more important than sharing the same favorite coffee, or travel destination, or alma mater. These “fun facts” might spark an initial connection, but to make it last you’ve got to go deeper.

You’ve got to move past the surface-level wants to reach the more meaningful, deeper-seeded needs. 

However, if you want to reach the depths of human neuroscience, you can tap into the non-conscious using “mirroring” techniques.

Sales mirroring

Mirroring is a strategy to imitate physical behaviors and communication idiosyncrasies in a way that lights up neurons in others’ brains – and often makes them feel connected to you.

Babies pick up on it within their first few hours. Toddlers learn language through it. You use it in new situations and settings by looking around at others for guidance on what to do simply by imitating how they behave. 

Your couples use it too, especially when they look around at others to learn how to book vendors like you. They don’t know how to plan a wedding or choose a pro – that’s where you come in.

But it’s going to take more time to explain than my little fingers can type on the keyboard. So head over to my podcast to get the easy, 20-minute version that’ll introduce you to:

  • Mirror neurons and sales mirroring

  • Why they help humans to survive

  • How they’ll help your business thrive

  • 5 specific tactics you can use to mirror couples during the sales process


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